I'd Rather Get Beat Up In An Alley

Do you think the Pats are a little nervous about Monday night’s game?  I feel like they might actually have some butterflies up there in chowdah land and that makes me very happy.  As scary as Tom Brady is, I prefer the Patriots sans Randy Moss any day.  I just don’t see Dieon Branch making 40-yard one-finger grabs in the back of our end zone.

I personally  have one teeny tiny little ounce of fear going into Monday night’s game (ok I have a few but whatever).  Have you noticed the way our running backs this season love jumping over the pile on short yardage situations?  You know, 3rd and 1-  Ladainian Tomlinson takes the hand-off then leaps up and over the scrum to pick up the first down.  If you’ve been watching I’m sure you’ve picked up on the fact that Sean Greene recently added this maneuver to his repertoire.  At this point I’m certainly not complaining… they’ve converted a number of important 1sts this season.  It’s just that Jerod Mayo routinely stuffs that play.  Violently.  With helmets popping off and stuff.

I don’t want to see our old man LT (or Greene for that matter) leap up for a glorious 1 yard gain only to be smashed by the evil minions of Bill Belichik.  Perhaps Rex watched some film and picked up on Mayo’s soul crushing tendencies.  One can hope…

Is there anyone out there that could tell me why the Broncos aren’t losing a draft pick for filming other team’s during their walk through?  Didn’t we already establish that if you’re caught trying to steal other team’s game plans via film, it is punishable by draft pick denial and a 2 Kabillion dollar fine?  Monkey-see monkey-do I guess.  Or maybe… monkey-see his boss cheat and win Super Bowls monkey-think “Why not?”  I knew that I didn’t like McDaniels but I couldn’t put my finger on it.  Now I’ve figured it out.

He’s a douche Bag. 

A lying, underhanded, back stabbing, (and now) cheating douche.  I hope he cuts himself shaving if he ever becomes man enough to grow facial hair.

One of my biggest concerns coming into this season was the lack of continuity among personnel from year to year.  We brought in so many new players with big names from foreign places I guess I was worried that the Jets wouldn’t feel like the Jets but more like some almost-all-star team. We let two of our “Play like a Jet” fan favorites go during the off season, Leon Washington being the most painful, and went on a crazy free-agent  spending spree.  Jason friggin’ Taylor is wearing Green and White for God’s sake… my concerns were real.  Would rooting for these Jets feel the same?  Would I have trouble pulling for this “Miami Heat” patchwork team wearing colors that match the blood pumping through my veins?

After Monday Night’s game against the Ravens it’s safe to say these are indeed the same ol’ New York Football Jets.  We showed the world how easy it is to take a talented group of men playing their inaugural game in a brand new stadium and make it look like they don’t even know the rules much less how to score a touchdown.  Illegal Shifts, loads of Pass Interference, pure stupidity (Keller) and fumbles galore… Yes: these men deserve to wear the Green and White.

Then why are all the Jets die-hards already jumping ship?  Literally during the 1st quarter of the game after Braylon’s idiotic penalty negated what would have been a beautiful pass to Dustin Keller my buddy looked at me with a straight face and yelled, “You know we’ve lost the game already!”  Classic abused puppy syndrome… he spent the rest of the game freaking out and now is refusing to go to the Patriots game Sunday because, “it’s going to break my heart to watch us go 0-2.”  This sentiment was not just Larry’s (sorry buddy -  you deserve it) but was also popular among many fans watching the game with us in the bar.  Not only are we in week 1 here but also in the 1st quarter of week 1.   All across the internet, on ESPN, and throughout my Jets-loving bar, people are pulling the shoot and giving up on the season.  I find it disheartening… and yet welcome.

The fact that Larry was right sucks and is beside the point.  I believe in Mojo.  I believe in Juju.  I don’t think the season is anywhere near over and fully expect to beat the Patriots despite Randy Moss’s bravado and Tom Brady’s new hairdo.  With Rex Ryan’s big mouth and coverage from Hard Knocks of training camp propelling the hype machine, our boys in Green have been adding new fans at an astonishing clip.  Seems like everywhere I look what used to say “Giants” now says “Jets.”  Everyone I talked to during the game had an in-depth knowledge of the differences between a 3-4 defense and a 4-6.  If I heard the words “Exotic Blitz” come out of one more analysts mouth I might have given myself a swirly in my aforementioned bar.  None of these things are an issue any more.  The masses are now rooting against us.  They’re cheering for the Jets to get punched in their big, wide, open mouths.

It’s back to being just us: the abused puppies, the die-hards who remember Testeverde’s achilles, Byar’s fumble, Marino’s fake spike, Rich Kotite, and the gall of Belichik hitting the road for New England.  It was before my time but some of us might even remember Shea Stadium, Maynard, Klecko, Namath and a glorious Super Bowl.

We are the Jets faithful and regardless of what happens this is our team.  True, we’re a bunch of idiots but we’re football smart idiots who sell out our games no matter how many losses we accrue or how stupid our tight end appears to be (10 yards Keller. NOT 9).  Other teams have fair-weather fans.  The Jets have foul-weather fans.  When things are going wrong, we nod in solidarity, “Yup, I remember this feeling.  Must be football season.”

I’m a rare breed amongst the sea of Green and White: an optimistic Jets fan.  It’s just in my nature to see the incredible possibilities rather than the perhaps inevitable defeat when the final whistle blows.  We all knew that the first three games of the season were going to be a bitch.  Why mope around when we lose the 1st one against what many consider to be a Super Bowl caliber team?

The Patriots don’t have the defense that the Ravens have but they do have an inexhaustibly meticulous coach who will go over every play from Sunday’s game with a fine-toothed comb.  Expect the Pats to stack the box.  Expect Brady to target Wilson and Cromartie.  Expect Larry to pronounce us dead in the water if we lose the coin toss.  I, for one, am really looking forward to a great game.